2009 - Year-in-Review

2009 – Year-in-Review

2009 was a pretty solid year for me. At 30 years old I finally got to see a Chicago Cubs game at Wrigley Field on arguably the prettiest day of the year with my surrogate older brother Chris Wells. I witnessed the glory of an Ohio State football game with my boy Winslow from the Sorority Section of the “Horseshoe”…The song “Cold Desert” by Kings of Leon left me shaking my head in Charleston at how awesome that simple song is live…By the way, remember how great “Use Somebody” was before the radio and rednecks got a hold of it?

2009 was the year of social experiments…For example I explored the adventures of online dating…ha…I know I am still laughing at that myself…It was the year I found my dream girl but I guess I was actually mistaken…It was the year I forever fell in love with the Fat Hen restaurant on John’s Island….

2009 was the year my friends Curt, Keefer, and Brandi all got married (for the record - 2 of the best weddings I have had the privilege of attending) and one of my best friends Rahul got engaged to the lovely Shilpa (also for the record - she is a much hotter girl than the doc should have ever been able to pull…alcohol is a miracle worker).

It was a year where South Carolina was put on the political map for all the wrong reasons…Thanks Mark Sanford for proving you are the countries worst governor …Joe Wilson proves how retarded this country can be. A ridiculous, rude, ill-timed shout actually helped his Republican career and helped him earn record amounts of donation money…Ahhh, good ole South Carolina….Though it’s the best state in the Union, it tends to blow my mind in stupidity.

It was a year that I realized I like Tiger Woods even more than I thought….A year where Michael Jordan officially let everyone know he is in fact a dickhead. 2009 was the year that I realized the Carolina Cup is the greatest day of the year even with torrential downpours, foot-deep mud, and lightning….

It was a good year…That being said, I will own 2010…I have a very good vibe about it…we will see..

Overall it was a pretty decent year in entertainment too….so here we go.

Top 5 Disappointments:

Actually lets start with what let me down this year in the world of entertainment

5. “Away We Go” – Everyone told me how great this movie was…Maybe I am still waiting for it to digest…I love Krasinski and Sam Mendes, but this movie did nothing for me…It went nowhere…Maybe that was the point, but outside of a great soundtrack by Alexi Murdoch the movie was simply disappointing.

4. Death Cab for Cutie “Meet Me at the Equinox” – Was there a more annoying song on the radio in 2009? No (sans that ass clown David Archuleta’s song)…thanks to the New Moon weirdos this song won’t go away…Absolutely the worst song ever written and performed by Ben Gibbard…not only did he piss me off with this god-awful song, but he married my Zooey…mother fucker…this is personal now…

3. “The Informers” (the movie) – Holy shit this was bad…but man, thank god for Amber Heards insanely hot, constantly nude body, otherwise I would have hit power on the DVD player 25 minutes into it….This was a disgrace to Bret Easton Ellis great book…oh wait, he co-wrote the screenplay, so I guess he is to blame…He was a lot cooler and more talented when was coked up…

2. “Terminator: Salvation” – I thought this movie was going to blow me away…nope…very under-whelming to say the least…maybe next time Bale…you’re still my dog…

1. Monster of Folk – M. Ward, Jim James, Conner Oberst, and Mike Mogis…Killer line-up…Mediocre results…This should have been mind-blowingly awesome, but it wasn’t…This was Folk-Rocks version of the Washington Redskins

Top 10 Movies:

I guess I am becoming harder and harder to impress, but I found this year to be rather mediocre again. I am so tired of movies trying to act cool (i.e. Righteous Kill, The Spirit, The Watchmen, etc)…Anyway, some of the flicks that almost made it: Harry Potter, Funny People, District 9, Public Enemies.

10. “The Hangover” – Funny yes…but was it really that funny? Not really…People keep telling me its top 10 of the decade….get-out-of-town…This movie doesn’t even sniff the top ten….and actually, I probably shouldn’t even put it in my top 10…oh well

9. “Sherlock Holmes” – Good flick. Entertaining, as most Guy Ritchie movies are, but this is more of DVD rental than a must-see.

8. “Star Trek” – I know…a nerd movie…let’s remember I am a nerd. I thought this movie was extremely entertaining and fun. Of course I did watch this at Cinebar in Charleston, SC and I was half-lit on Sam Adams Seasonals at the time…hmmm…

7. “Adventureland” – Teenage/Twenty-something Angst is my Achilles heel…Great soundtrack…Great role by my man Ryan Reynolds and overall solid movie about growing up and falling for a girl and being completely confused about young adult life…I like Kristen Stewart when she isn’t in a retarded vampire movie…She is like my new Jena Malone for teen-angst.

6. “The Go-Getter” – Teenage Angst + Zooey Deschanel = Rietveld’s Heaven

5. “Extract” – Great movie that no one saw. Oh how I love Jason Bateman…He has the best delivery in the business. It’s a short flick by Mike Judge who gave us Office Space, Idiocracy, and of course Beavis and Butthead…Rent it, its good…by the way, Bateman ends up in 3 of my top 10…

4. “Sin Nombre” – My man Gael Garcia Bernal produced this Mexican gem-of-a-movie. I thought it was a great story and a story told from the side of the immigrant that we gringos normally don’t think about or perhaps not want to think about. If you don’t mind subtitles then you should give it a chance.

3. “RocknRolla” – I know it technically came out in 2008, but in South Carolina I had to wait for the DVD, which hit in 2009. This was Guy Ritchie’s best movie of the past 2 years, not “Sherlock Holmes”. Though I recommend seeing Holmes, “RocknRolla” is my Ritchie choice of the year.

2. (tie). “500 Days of Summer” – Cheesy at times, but with a decent love story featuring Zooey and a killer soundtrack I am hooked. Good story about getting screwed over by a girl you are head-over-heels for…Not sure if I loved or hated the dance scene…I go back and forth on that, but overall it was a good movie until the “Autumn” line at the end….

“State of Play” – Crowe and Affleck are awesome in this political drama…My girl Rachel McAdams comes back from the dead playing a great little sidekick to Crowe’s character. I wont say anything about this movie in case you havent seen it….it’s one of those, zig-zagging stories that throws you a few curveballs.

1. “Up in the Air” – No question this is Clooney’s best movie. Whoever did the casting for this drama deserves a raise. I call this movie Depressingly Awesome…It’s real and perfect for 2010 and America’s current situation, both morally and economically…The soundtrack is amazing…It helped that they threw in one of my favorite Elliott Smith’s tracks near the end… “Snow Angels”…Great movie…

Top 5 TV Shows:

Best year in TV I can remember….Here are my Honorable Mentions: “Psych”, “The Office” (yeah, its not in the top 5), Bones.

5. The Soup – Joel Mchale is still my dog and “The Soup” is still one of the greatest shows on TV…I will catch up on “Community” here soon.

4. Modern Family – If it wasn’t for “The League” this would be the best new show of the year…Shot like “The Office” but since “The Office” has gotten stale, this ABC comedy gets the nod….

3. Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia – No idea why I didn’t give this show a chance earlier in life…Ridiculously funny and uncomfortable…It doesn’t matter if its race, religion, government, or mental illness, this show will make fun of it…Come talk to me, I will give you my dvds so you can catch up….

2. The League – Holy shit this show is funny…it is hardly about fantasy football like the previews made it look. Great casting and I can imagine a lot of improvising…Funniest show on tv this year….please lord, let this show come back next season….for the record, both Sunny and The League come on FX on Thursdays….If you don’t believe me on how awesome this show is, just download the “Mr. McGibblets” episode…

1. Friday Night Lights – Thank you Curt and Jared for turning me on to this show. This is a no-brainer…No show holds a candle to the casting, the music, and the writing to this show. I want to beat up NBC for not showing the new episodes now and making us wait until the summer….Please watch this show so it will not get cancelled….Do yourself a favor and go to Netflix and put all the season on your queue….You will thank me…


Top 5 Albums:

Not a mind-blowing year in top-to-bottom albums, but pretty solid:
Honorable mentions: Muse – The Resistance, AA Bondy, The Temper Trap – “Conditions”, 500 Days of Summer Soundtrack

5. Julian Casablancas: “Phrazes for the Young” – Is Casablancas a douchebag? Yep, but “Phrazes” is a good change of pace album. It’s a good driving around on a Friday night type of album if that makes any sense…I guarantee you he was listening to a lot of Depeche Mode when he wrote this album.

4. Coconut Records: “Davy” – Ahhh, my man Jason Schwartzman. Anyone who knows me, knows that I have an unhealthy crush on my shaggy haired Jewish hero. Great summer cd, with catchy hooks left and right. You will sing along to this album by the second spin.

3. M. Ward: “Hold Time” – I love the M. Ward. A guy who gets the most out of a mediocre voice, with contagious riffs, hand-claps, and solid lyrics. He is definitely in my top 5 man crushes for 2009. I guess I can forgive him for the “Monsters of Folk” commercial trainwreck.

2. Phoenix: “Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix” – Summer cd for this year and years to come. Though one or two of the songs on this album burn the edges of my nerves, “Lasso,” “Rome,” “1901,” and “Lisztomania” are all unstoppable

1. Slow Club: “Yeah So” – My greatest find of 2009. Two kids (a guy and a girl) from Sheffield, England have put together a pop-folk-sing-along masterpiece. Simply based on her voice (and British accent of course), I would marry Rebecca Taylor tomorrow…but she is also pretty damn cute. But in short, this album has stellar overlapping vocals, hand clapping, tambourines, and choruses to die for…They had me at overlapping vocals…Seriously, it is $7.99 on iTunes, I will pay you back if you don’t like it…seriously…

Top 15 Songs:

Great year in individual songs…Though I thought albums were down, I found a ton of songs that fell in love with…so we are going with 15….sorry, I couldn’t narrow it down to 10, muchless 5.

15. “Mrs. Cold” – Kings of Convenience: Classic KoC…They almost lull you to sleep with their songs, but in a good way…does that make sense?

14. “Animal” – Miike Snow: I found myself listening to more electronic/synthesized music than ever before….This was my favorite of that genre…Dancy, but not too dancy…pretty sure dancy isn’t a word…

13. “I’m Not Okay” – Matt Pond PA: This is a My Chemical Romance cover and its retarded how awesome it is…it is the best cover song since Gary Jule’s cover of Tears for Fears “Mad World”…My Chemical Romance has to be like “fuck man, that hippie’s version blows ours away”…because it does

12. “Left & Right in the Dark” – Julian Casablancas: Great pop tune with a touch of that 80s flare I mentioned…

11. “Resistance” – Muse: British arena rock at its finest…I like how ESPN has turned Muse into a Jock Jams band (thanks ESPN for ruining “Uprising”)…but this is solid track off their latest release…which is good but not as good as the previous releases..

10. “Blood Bank” –Bon Iver: The EP is a good hold-me-over until the next full length, but certainly not to the standards of“For Emma Forever Ago”, but this song is warm and campfire worthy.

9. “My Love” - The Bird and the Bee: Jared and Stacey got me hooked on this poppy, happy-go-lucky, hand-clapping love song…if you want a cheer me up type of song, download this one…

8. “Home” – Edward Sharp and the Magnetic Zeros: This song makes you feel like you are at a western hootenanny (first time I have ever written that word…ever…such a good word)…this might be a little high up for this song, but I love it for some reason.

7. “Just Breathe” – Pearl Jam: I wish this track would have been written in time for the “Into the Wild” soundtrack. It would have fit perfectly in one of the closing scenes…Simple and elementary in terms of lyrics, yet a great love song….

6. “Sweet Disposition” – Temper Trap: Great track off the 500 Days soundtrack. They use overlapping vocals to steal my heart with a sound a little similar to

5. “Rome” – Phoenix: It was terribly difficult to pick between, Rome, Lasso, and 1901….But Rome gets the nod here…Pop album of the year for sure and this is my favorite song off of “Amadeus”

4. “Never had Nobody Like You” – M. Ward: Light up the chiminea with your girl and put this track on…she will love you…Budweiser has started using the riff in its douchebag commercials, but I support their good taste in music….Oh yeah, Zooey is singing to me on this one…

3. “Would You” – Richard Swift: A scruffy white guy that can croon like he is a 1950s Motown artist….Best love song of the year.

2. “Cold Desert” – Kings of Leon: Eerie beautiful…A lonely, yet epic song that just blows my mind no matter how many times I listen to it…

1. “It Doesn’t Have to be Beautiful, Unless it’s Beautiful” – Slow Club: So good it hurts…download it…please…Chicks singing…Guys Singing…Crazy guitar picking…and a chorus to kill for…


Top 5 Guilty Pleasures

5. Gardening – yeah, the hobby of gardening…when I am not binge drinking in Charleston or arm wrestling for money on the streets, I like to plant annuals, a few perennials, and the occasional herb….my daylilies, my rose, and my crepe myrtle were amazing this year

4. Ally Bank Commercials – The 2 I love are with the girls a) the redhead on the bike b) the pony commercial…The kids are so adorable it almost makes me want to have kids….and the stares the little redhead and the brunette both give the bank guy could get them roles for Firestarter 2….Poor kids…

3. Lady GaGa: “Just Dance” – I have served up many of unsuspected foe to this track… Let’s keep this between me and you…ha…no, seriously, this is between me and you.

2. “The Sing-Off” – The bastards at NBC hooked me with Shawn Stockman…Always had a soft spot for that guy…he was the most underrated Boyz-II-Men singer by far…So I checked it out and the show actually was pretty entertaining putting a-cappella groups against each other to “sing-off” for a $100,000…pretty entertaining…though extremely gay.

1. “Up” …Yeah, the fucking animated movie…its good…quit judging me…


So that is that…I know…I have no humor in this years countdown or hidden agendas…it was pretty weak…my bad…I will try to do better next year…2010 - Year of Rietveld